We all want someone whom we can love and grow old with. Most of us genuinely want to not only be loved, but be head over heels in love with someone. I mean right? Ideally, that is what most people are looking for. Admittedly, somehow or another people seem to fall in love, get married and then something happens over time. Somehow they fall out of love… It doesn’t happen on purpose, but they stop realizing and doing things for/with their partner. We stop doing the things for each other that made us fall in love to begin with.
Here are twelve things that are HUGE for a lasting and healthy relationship.
- Sacrifices ~ We all need to know and understand the things that we are or will not be willing to sacrifice or comprise; both with ourselves and in a relationship. If you understand and know what these things are then you will not set yourself up for failure. These things can be difficult to figure out about yourself. It depends on who you are as a person, what you want out of life and out of a relationship.
2. Friendship ~ We have all seen couples who stop being friends, start leading two separate lives and become more of roommates. We seldom seem to notice when it is happening to our own relationship. Being friends with your partner is a big deal. When you stop enjoying things together in general the connection starts to fade.
3. Consideration ~ Consideration is something people forget about the most. By nature we as humans are inclined to be all about ourselves. Consider your partner and their physical and emotional needs.
4. Appreciation ~ With time it becomes easy to take people for granted. Everything they do for you, all of their daily efforts and the things that your partner just does, without you having to ask them to do it. You may appreciate it but, do you acknowledge it and say thank you or show your appreciation? Remember to recognize their efforts, potential, achievements and journey.
5. Taking Time Out ~ We live in a nonstop busy society, rushing from one deadline to another and consumed by social networking sites. We are juggling ourselves between our jobs, children, house work and more. It becomes difficult to take time out of our schedule to actually spend quality time with someone. Actually talking to them and enjoying their company without distraction from everything else. Time is something you have to take to keep a strong emotional connection with your partner.
6. A Simple Surprise ~ When is the last time you have done a simple and nice unexpected thing for your partner? Something as simple as cooking them dinner, bring home flowers or a card to say I love you or thank you, drawing them a bath to relax, getting them that special something that you know that they will enjoy or like. It doesn’t have to be a big elaborate gift or act. Simple and small things carry a large impact.
7. Laughter & Happiness ~ Sometimes the daily stresses of life become overwhelming and laughter truly can be one of the best medications. Consider watching a new comedy or talking about an older funnier time. Find something to do together that will bring happiness to both you and your partner.
8. The Underlining Cold Hearted Truth & Communicating Effectively ~ How many times have you seen something in the lines of “if she says she doesn’t care.. then she really does cares” or “he says it’s okay to go but, it really isn’t?” This type of communication and underlining resentment is not necessary. Simply say what you mean and well… mean it. If something is bothering you or making you happy then be sure to express those feelings and address them. The guessing game doesn’t do any favors for either party. So be honest but, subtle and get down to the nitty-gritty and tell your partner what you truly expect or want from them. Use gentle words, avoid escalating to an argument over little things and be sure to communicate the likes and dislikes of things.
9. Acceptance ~ Understand and know that loving someone means loving them for who they are. You have to love not only the good, but the bad. Trying to change someone or force them to be someone they aren’t will not provide the results you are hoping for. The best relationships have partners that compliment each other by example; meaning one partner inspires or brings out qualities in the other naturally without force. Loving someone means loving them unconditionally, past their imperfections and for all of the things that make them who they are.
10. Trust & Loyalty ~ If you have any insecurities or fears concerning your relationship; it needs to be addressed. It is important to feel secure and non-threatened by things outside of your relationship; regardless what or who it is concerning. Trust is an essential part of a healthy relationship. It’s the foundation of which your core values are committed to one another more than just physically, but emotionally. A healthy relationship means fully trusting your partner and having an atmosphere to feel comfortable enough to do things without any fear or the need to feel possessive and clingy.
11. Determination ~ Choose to put in the effort for a healthy relationship. It takes determination and WORK to not only have a successful fulfilling relationship, but to stay in love. The most important thing to remember is that successfulness comes from determination; really working on what you are compassionate about and love.
12. Taking Responsibility ~ Take responsibility for your feelings, actions and happiness. Remember that your actions can largely imprint your partners feelings. Strive to take ownership of your emotions, actions and choices. We can choose to learn from things and grow for improvement.
Sometimes we all need to step back and look from another perspective to see how we are treating our partner. Consider how these things could impact your relationship…
Share your feedback and thoughts in the comments section. I’d love to hear them!