Which is worse to you emotional or physical infidelity?

Emotional Vs. Physical Infidelity…

photo credit to freeimages

 

Here we are at another controversial topic; is an emotional affair as bad or worse than a physical affair? There is defiantly a lot of disagreements of interpretation of the word “affair”  and on this matter. Some people believe no harm is done if there is not any physical actions or sexual intercourse. While others would argue that emotional affairs are very real and are more repulsive in some ways because time, energy, thought and heart are involved; which is deeper than just the physical act of casual sexual intercourse. Let’s face facts, nobody and I mean nobody wants to experience any kind infidelity by their partner regardless, whether it is emotional or physical.

I have to say the entire debate on this controversial topic is disturbing to me. I personally think that an emotional affair triumphs over the actual act of a casual “hook up”. To me the absolute worst would be an  emotional with the act of the physical infidelity. It doesn’t matter if it started with just physical and then turned emotional or vise versa.  This becomes more than just a disappointment, it was not accident nor did it just happen. Having the emotional with the physical affair not only crushes the trust in the relationship, but the complete balance and harmony of it.

What started out so innocent can quickly become “more.”  Yes, it is possible to be “just friends” with someone of the opposite gender, but how much energy are you investing in that person? According to Wikipedia the role of an affair is to create emotional distance in a relationship. Someone other than your partner has made an impact of the level of intimacy, emotional distance and the overall dynamic balance on the relationship. An emotional affair without actions is hurtful and even though you may had clear intentions to not act upon the thoughts, you still had them.  To me this type of affair usual has an underlining reason; due from a lack of something they are missing in their relationship.  You can repair a relationship and restore trust after this type of affair with hard work, understanding and a lot of time.

So here is my take on an actual physical affair… I’m sure most women are not going to agree with me on this, but then again I’m not most women. To me I think the physical affair alone without the emotional is better. Not that I want either of them to happen to me! In my mind  I rationalize it this way. If my partner was to cheat on me with some casual hook up or have a one night stand, it would be easier for me to sallow and possible forgive over.  The reality of that situation comes down to a bad decision and lack of judgment.  These affairs happen in the heat of the moment without any consideration of their partner or the consequences that it’s going to cause.  Afterwards, the reality of “OMG” what did I just do and the panic of the repercussions start to set in.

An emotional plus physical affair requires intentional and careful consideration of the actions, thoughts, and energy that is happening with someone else other than their partner.  Think about the time and energy that was put into the affair to pull  it off for a short or extended period of time. They are fully aware of the betrayal and hurt they are causing for their partner; they’re selfish and just simply don’t care enough to choose better actions.   To me this is unforgivable! There is no recovering from this type of deception and hurt for me.

Sadly enough most people will or have experienced cheating at one point or another in a relationship. Most relationships do not recover after an affair.  However, there are those few that are able to rebuild, learn to trust again and move forward past the pain. So what do you think?

 

I would love to know my readers opinions on this topic. Comment below with your feedback.

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